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Post by Scotty Kovac on Mar 1, 2010 12:02:15 GMT 1
Not for the first time in the last few weeks it felt like the world had dissolved around him. There was nothing but that moment there on the damp grass on a winter’s evening beside Finlay. With his knees drawn up to his chest Scotty felt like a child again only there was no one here to comfort him, to tell him all the things he so desperately wanted to here. He was alone, trying and failing to comfort and communicate his regrets and pain to his former best friend. He’d forced himself and a child upon the girl, the boy didn’t know why he’d even dared to say sorry, in his head it sounded so pathetic the more he went over what he’d said only moments ago.
”I know, nothing is going to change. No amount of wishing will bring back August, will make me human again or let us go back to before that night,” the changeling lamented. Like Fin, he too was finding all his tears had been spent and that all he wanted to do was go back to sleep as the confrontation and its emotions drained him. This was beginning to get all too much for the boy; happening upon the girl he’d done such awful things and finding out she was carrying his half-human child was not what he had left the Hog’s Head wanting to face.
Again Fin’s heart began to flutter, signalling the drugs, the vampire guessed were tranquilizers, taking affect. The paternal instinct to protect his unborn child once again flared along with worry for the poor girl herself. As if it was suddenly feeling pity for him, the universe granted the boy the small mould of an idea at Fin’s request. ”I’ll take it, and you’ll only be left with the memories like you want. Both me and the baby will leave your life for good and you can move on. On the condition you stop doing this to yourself,” Scotty spoke up suddenly, gesturing to the girl’s weakened condition. It probably wasn’t the greatest idea but for a spur of the moment decision he was pretty happy with it.
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Post by Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie on Mar 1, 2010 18:26:37 GMT 1
[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] She just wanted to sleep, Fin just wanted to curl up beneath the covers of her bed and sleep. Maybe tomorrow she could put this down to a horrifically vivid nightmare, push it away from her mind as nothing more than her subconscious. Maybe. Hopefully. Both of them knew how screwed up this was, what they had lost. Everything he said just ripped each wound open again, How she wanted August back, what she would give to have Scotty human again, then -that night- would never have happened.
Fin blinked slowly as he came up with a solution, taking a moment for the words to register. He'd take it. She'd have to carry it but he would take it. Then they'd both be out of her life forever. But he wanted her to stop this. This? The drink and the drugs? No. Fuck him. She dragged herself to her feet, stumbling a few steps until she could lean against a tree, gather her bearings. "No."
Making her way towards the forest, all Fin wanted to do was get back to Hogwarts, he couldn't follow her through the gates there, he couldn't go on school grounds. Her feet dragged against the floor, branches grazing her bare legs as she moved deeper into the forest. He was nuts. She wanted rid of this baby, she didn't want to carry it to term let alone without the only things that took the edge off the pain. |
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Post by Scotty Kovac on Mar 17, 2010 8:23:31 GMT 1
No? Was all she could say to him, no? The changeling opened his mouth and huffed in despair. She had to agree, he had to make her agree. There was no way Finlay could keep punishing her body with the drugs and alcohol for something he’d done to her. Scotty knew that the only one she’d kill would be herself and he couldn’t let her do that but he was still worried about the baby. His paternal instinct was growing ever stronger only fuelled with the memories of how keen he’d been to one day have a family of his own when he’d seen all his relatives together. As twisted as it sounded, the child in Fin’s womb was his only chance to ever have a child that was part of him.
”Please Fin,” Scott begged with hands clasped together and a look of pure desperation. He half moved forward to stop her retreating back into the forest but knew that blocking off her path completely would only make her panic and rightly so; he hadn’t exactly done anything to prove to her that he was sort of the same person he’d been before everything. ”You’re so desperate to get rid of it, but the only one you’re poisoning is yourself. You’ll overdose, slip into a coma, deliver it and die, it would be the only thing keeping you alive,” the boy told Fin his voice pleading and fraught. Sam had explained how half-vampires conceived by a vampire worked and that, combined with his medical knowledge, meant he was sure about what he was saying.
It was the last thing the vampire wanted; to hear of his former-best friend’s death. Maybe it was more for his own selfish desires of keeping Fin’s death off his conscious and to keep safe his last link to humanity that he was trying to beg her to sober up but then again maybe it wasn’t. The boy wanted her safe, wanted her to move on without any reminders of himself and that included any damage caused by the drugs.
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Post by Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie on Mar 19, 2010 2:05:19 GMT 1
[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] Why would Fin agree? She was... well she wasn't exactly happy but look at how her life was going! She was being signed out of classes whenever she wanted, she was drinking more than ever, taking more than ever. She felt nothing anymore. Like now, careening through the sharp branches, latticing her calves and thighs, she couldn't feel it. Why would she give this up? This thing inside her, the only good thing about it was that she could handle more of the drugs and drink and that had led to this feeling, the feeling of nothingness which obliterated any feeling she had had before.
Hearing Scott's words, Fin half faltered as he begged, hearing the pain in his voice, the hopelessness. You’re so desperate to get rid of it, but the only one you’re poisoning is yourself. You’ll overdose, slip into a coma, deliver it and die, it would be the only thing keeping you alive. Feeling her defences rise, Fin started to block herself off. So what? So what if that happened? Still, it stopped her in her tracks, causing her to turn. "So? I overdose, I go into a coma, I spurt this fucking thing out and I die... so what? Scott... I..."
Raking her hands over her head, she let out a distressed snarl before sending her fist slamming into the nearest tree. She didn't want to be dramatic, she knew how the words sounded in her head, they sounded desperate and stupid. Cradling her hand against her chest, feeling no pain in it but knowing she'd probably done some damage. She wanted to hurt him. He had been her best friend and she wanted to hurt him so much. For that reason alone she forgot the worry of being a drama queen, "I'm already dead... losing you, losing August? That almost did me in. But what -you- did to me... -that- killed me in here." She pointed to her chest, then tilted her head to the side, pulling her hair out of the way, "Finish it now, do the kindest thing. Do me this one favour because I won't do this. I won't carry this thing, you don't know how much fucking pain it causes me. I won't do it without the drugs and the drink because I can't. If I'm not constantly dosed up, I can't get comfortable, sometimes I can't move... so I can't do it. I can't." |
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Post by Scotty Kovac on Mar 28, 2010 7:01:13 GMT 1
So what? Was that all she could say? The hopes and dreams that she’d professed to him in times of peace and normalcy, did they mean nothing to her now? Scott had thought it impossible but Fin was making him feel more and more ashamed and miserable over what he’d done to her. Curse the instinctual wants of a changeling; so inhuman and utterly terrifying to all the people who witnessed or felt it. He wanted to tell her, let her know that the boy had been taken over only temporarily in the morgue but it would only sound like lame excuses to her ears.
Hopelessness was all his body had the capacity to feel. What if Fin did overdose and slip away after the delivery of the child, what then? The baby would surely become a ward of the Ministry and be shipped to some obscure orphanage or be taken in by Fin’s family and then there would be no chance of its father ever seeing it. The roughness of her words made the changeling flinch slightly, her crude description making his stomach turn as it brought thoughts of blood to the surface of his mind. Although he had eaten before sneaking out, Scott didn’t trust his new lust. This meeting had to be wrapped up and soon, before he got hungry and before he was sought out by his guardians or worse, Dacian.
”Wouldn’t you rather live? To say a big ‘fuck you!’ to me and the thing that I am? If you keep doing what you’re doing you’ll die without ever achieving anything, including the death of the kid which is what you want.” His tone was becoming increasingly desperate; they didn’t have much more time together.
It was becoming an ever increasing struggle to find the words to say that might just convince her to lay off the drugs and alcohol. To make matters worse she practically started to beg Scott to finish her, to take her life after he’d regretted to do so in the hospital. Indeed part of him wanted to. The thrum of her heart echoed in the changeling’s ears and the scent of what instinct told him was her blood was so tangible in the air he could almost taste it.
Supernaturally fast the boy came up in front of the school girl and took her warm cheeks in his cold hands. Their grip forced Fin’s eyes to meet his own. ”No,” Scott whispered gently, shaking his head and sending his shaggy brown hair flying. ”I know you don’t believe me or want to but you have to listen to me. All this will pass, the pain, the nausea, the baby and if you give it to me you could go on and live the life you wanted; free of any memories of me and the awful things I made you go through.
“Whether you want to believe it or not, you’re not dead. Your heart still beats as strong as the day you were born, blood still warms and colours your cheeks and you can live on past this. I’m the one who’s dead, can you feel a heartbeat? “ he said softly, moving one of Fin’s hands to the left side of his chest. ”You and that child are my one last link to the world that I knew and I know it’s selfish but if you died I don’t think I could ever recover from the pain it would bring. I want you to live on, have the life I can’t.”
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Post by Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie on Mar 28, 2010 13:20:41 GMT 1
[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] Live? Why? What did she have to live for? She didn't want to do anything any more. She had no friends, she'd lost the people she had cared about most in the space of five years, she had screwed her life up to the point where she wasn't likely to graduate with any sort of qualification to her name bar dealing. On top of that, the whole Scott situation was just eating away at her, how they could have gone from best friends to her not even being able to stomach looking at him in the space of a few months. Deep down inside, she knew Scotty, her Scotty, couldn't have done that to her, but she was too stubborn and too hurt to admit it, or admit the fact that he was back to being as close to the Scotty she knew as he was going to get. If she just kept thinking he was that monster, she could deal with it.
Barely having time to jump, Fin flinched as Scott appeared in front of her, taking her face in his ice cold hands. She wasn't sure if the flinch was from the speed he'd moved, or from the temperature of his skin. What had she been thinking? Offering her neck to him, he already knew what her blood tasted like. A swift pull of guilt washed through her at her torturous actions and, for a moment, she wanted to beg his forgiveness. Fin didn't think she could have cried any more, but sure enough, more tears toppled onto her cheeks, before she stopped fighting the inevitable and met his gaze. Biting down on her bottom lip, Fin listened to him talk, promising her this would all go away and she could carry on.
She knew he was trying to make her feel better, knew he was trying to tell her she was strong, but the truth made her heart break as he pressed her hand to his chest. He -was- dead. She -was- alive. So why did it feel like it was the other way round? He had Viv, he had his new vampire family, he had a life after death. She couldn't see where she could go from this. He was right though, she would die from this and the thing would still live. Her only thought was that she would know peace, she could just drift off, and she'd still never have to see either of them again, she'd never be hurt, never know heartbreak. It would just be so simple.
Searching his eyes desperately for some sign that he -was- tricking her, that the monster was still in control, Fin found she couldn't. The eyes staring into hers were that of her best friend, the one whose words rang true, that her death really would affect him. Knowing all too well how stupid it would sound, Fin sobbed at the stupidity of the words about to leave her lips, "I wanted a life with you... I never... not even 'together'... I would have liked it... but I... you guys were all I had. I thought we'd all be friends forever." |
[/b] She knew why she wouldn't be able to go on, the memories of them all, of what Scott had done, or the changeling, they would haunt her for the rest of her life. It struck her, what she needed if he wanted her to carry this child for him, live after for him. She couldn't remember anything. "Okay.." She whispered, a cold chill spreading through her body at the terms she was about to lay on the boy she had pined over for years, whose one night mistake had been the catalyst for all that had come to being, "I'll do it, you can have it... but... that's it. I can't live on like you want if you're there... and the memories, I don't want them. So... if you want me to get clean, you take the baby and I want the memories gone. You'll have died that night with Auggie. I'll figure out the rest... but that's what I want. I want my memories changed."[/b][/justify][/size][/color][/font][/td][/tr][/table] [/center]
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Post by Scotty Kovac on Apr 25, 2010 16:52:22 GMT 1
Stupid, no. Absolutely and gut-wrenchingly heartbreak, yes. The words Finlay spoke broke the dam and the tears Scott had tried so hard to fight for both of their sakes flowed freely. She had wanted something so beautiful, so innocent and hopeful. Nothing more than a life with someone, even if it was just in friendship. The boy quivered and sucked air in desperately. The world was going dull and as it darkened everyone but Fin disappeared. For support his hands left her cheeks and went to her shoulders. Her words had been like a knife to the gut.
”I’m sorry Fin, so sorry. So, so sorry,” as all he could splutter out for a moment. Friends forever she’d thought they’d be; she, August and himself. That man, in the alley, had taken it all away when he’d murdered August and then turned his wrath onto Scott. That man had destroyed everything he had ever known, his life, his hopes and dreams. For a moment why the pair were there beside the lake was forgotten as thoughts of unbelievable anger and revenge filled Scott’s whole being.
And then Finlay whispered something that brought him back to the present. She said okay.
One simple word was enough to bring an unstable changeling from the brink of making a reckless promise of revenge the boy knew he would not be able to keep. ”Okay?” Scotty choked out, unbelievingly. Had she really just agreed to what he’d thought had been a hopeless request? Yes, her terms answered the question. A part of him wanted so much to selfishly argue against them but the reasonable, sensible, Gryffindor side of him knew agreeing to them would be the only way she in turn would agree to his own terms.
”I accept your terms, I’ll be forgotten. Not even the whisper of a memory and I’ll never seek you out but I won’t forget you,” the boy uttered softly, hiccoughing as he tried to compose himself. He dropped his arms from her shoulders and stepped back from her. ”It’s time to let each other go,” Scott whispered. The look on his face was soft, as soft as human Scott’s gaze had been. It was a look he’d always reserved for Fin, his best friend. ”Now you should go, before they find us. Get back to the castle where it’s safe from things like me.” Sam and Viv couldn’t be far off.
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Post by Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie on Apr 26, 2010 23:13:11 GMT 1
[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] Fin stood completely stoic, still feeling numb from what she'd just done. She'd named her terms, after feeling his hands move from her face to her shoulders, watching him break from her honest answer to wishing that they'd be friends forever. She'd led him into a false sense of security, allowing him for a split second to believe she would just have agreed like that, only to bombard him with the reality of why she had said yes. That moment of relieved disbelief on his face, tinted with a slight glimmer of happiness, would forever be burned into her memory, the moment she had become the bitch and hurt him back.
Well, not forever. Just a few more months. He had agreed to her terms. So thick with emotion that his voice barely managed to get the words out. Part of Fin felt a sense of elation, joy that this would be over soon, the baby would be born and she would be wiped. However, another part of her wishes he hadn't listened to the reasonable, sensible Gryffindor in his head and had argued with her, fought for her friendship. That was about as useful as wishing the night with Silas had never happened. They couldn't go back to how it was. Even if they could have found a way to forgiving each other for everything that had happened, there was the child. How could they be normal when the baby would constantly remind them of what had happened?
As Scott moved away, Fin brought her rapidly swelling hand up to support it against her chest, nodding as he spoke about it being time to let each other go. Taking in a shuddered breath, Fin looked up and blinked the tears away from her eyes. So this was it. A friendship she had once thought would have withstood everything, had come to this, a heartbreaking goodbye filled with pain and desperation.
Taking her own steps away, Fin couldn't bring herself to look at Scott, fearing that, if she did, she wouldn't be able to follow through with her own end of the deal, of forgetting him. Now you should go, before they find us. Get back to the castle where it’s safe from things like me. Letting out a slow breath, Fin's eyes remained firmly on the floor, glaring at the twigs and dirt around her feet. She felt lower than that. "Yeah..." It was quiet, drawn out, more a sound of resignation and defeat than anything, "Would you tell Samuel to meet me someplace? I'm going to need someone to talk to about carrying this thi... baby."
With that, she turned her back on him, hugging her hand to her body to support it but also in a sort of self comforting way. She'd turned away. She was leaving. Unable to even bring herself to say goodbye, Fin just continued to walk back through the forest, back towards the school. She needed to hold herself together, she needed to get back to her room. She could break there, locked away from anyone. As she moved further and further away from the lake, Fin felt herself go numb, growing with every step. It was over. |
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Post by Samuel Jacobs on May 1, 2010 10:45:48 GMT 1
They were in the fringes of the Forbidden Forest, following Scott’s meandering course at a dead run. To begin with the trail lacked purpose but by now it was obvious which way he was heading: Hogwarts. The trees were impossibly tall, their branches high above their heads. The ground was littered with roots and dropped pine needles, making the footing unsteady. Even Samuel would stumble occasionally, but attuned reflexes kept him from falling. Vivian had more of an issue, but Sam was always there to catch her.
The night was wearing on but the trail was getting stronger. Scott has passed by just more than an hour ago and by the speed at which Samuel was catching up, Scott had been moving slowly. Vivian ran in front of Samuel, though he was the faster of the two, and the better tracker. He could make this journey more rapidly without Vivian, but the thought of leaving her behind did not even cast a shadow on his mind.
For once Samuel did not know what to expect. Scott had evaded him with a lie, saying he was going to visit the Hogs while Vivian was there. Sam had put enough trust in the boy that deception was the last thing on his mind. So later that night when Sam finished his business and entered the Hogs near closing time, he had fully expected to see Scott there. Instead, Vivian had not seen him, so the boy could be anywhere.
Thankfully there had been a trail, and once the older vampire had set them on it, Vivian was able to follow it too. Her proficiency in tracking had increased with tuition, and it was situations like this that would put her to the test. If the circumstances had been less severe than a rogue changeling on the loose, it would have been a good time to further her training. Instead, Sam kept track of the trail and if Vivian had trouble, he directed her back on course.
The trees became younger towards the edge of the forest, and bushes and other ground foliage impeded their progress. The forest opened out as the Black Lake spanned the valley in front of them. The scent was concentrated here, and Samuel pointed out where Scott had sat for a long while. More troubling, however, was the presence of a second scent. It ticked Samuel’s memory, and after a moment of logical reasoning, taking the closeness to the school into account, he recognised it as Finlay Mackenzie’s scent.
The older vampire stiffened, and this time when he picked up the trail leading back into the trees, he put Vivian behind him. This trail was minutes old, so Scott was just up ahead. The girl’s scent mixed with the changeling’s determined that the two were here at the same time. There were no signs of a struggle yet, but then a deep breath picked up trace amounts of blood on the air.
Samuel surged forward, the course foliage snagging at his trousers and the thorns scratching at his skin. Scott came into view, alone, but the vampire wasted no time capturing the boy’s arm. With an efficiency that suggested practice, or years of repetition, Sam took a pair of modern handcuffs from his belt and with the click of metal he fastened Scott’s wrists behind his back. A stronger vampire might break them with determination, but Scott was young and weak in comparison.
He took Scott’s shoulder, turned him and levelled his gaze with his. “You will stay still. You will not struggle. You will answer my questions.” His voice was somewhat clipped. There was no anger, but it was clear to anyone who knew the vampire that he was not in the most amiable of moods.
“Vivian,” Samuel gestured for the girl to come forward, “Hold him. Keep a hand here, and if he moves, lift upwards.” He showed Vivian where she could hold the ridged bar between the cuffs, and mimed what to do if Scott protested. Dislocated shoulders would not stop a determined changeling, but it would give Samuel enough time to return to restrain him again. “I will not be long. Please refrain from questioning him until I return.”
Sam had already determined that Finlay was not still here, but it took him a moment to discovered where the blood traces originated from. A nearby tree at what would be shoulder height for the human girl smelt more strongly. It was not enough blood for an attack, and after following her trail that led away from Scott, he could tell she was not bleeding much at all. Despite the urge to follow after the mortal to see her safely back to the castle, Scott was his main concern.
He returned to the pair after a few minutes, glad to see they were where he left them. He gave a nod to Vivian and took Scott from her. He turned Scott’s back to a tree, and ordered the taller boy to sit. Once the changeling was down, Samuel crouched beside him. “You lied to me, Scott. I trusted you to follow the rules I set out. I must know where you are at all times. By lying to me and coming here, you have but yourself and others in danger. What you have done tonight is inexcusable. You have broken my trust, and you have let us and yourself down.”
Sam shifted his weight, letting a moment of silence fall to let his words set in. “You will tell me why you came here, and why you met with Finlay. Why can I smell her blood?” The vampire was no longer the friendly man who usually took care of Scott. He was carefully calculated, his words even more deliberate and precise. Even his accent was less noticeable. Scott had broken the rules and activated the lawman that presided when Samuel was on duty.
Samuel was disappointed to say the least. Scott had been making progress, fighting the changeling instinct and in this one night he could have undone it all. A month’s hard work ruined. Sam wanted to know why he had chosen this night to rebel, and if it was not just coincidence that he had met with Finlay. Samuel had many questions, and luckily an eternity to get answers.
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