Walking Forward, Looking Back {Fin}

[Dimitri Beklea]

Dimitri Beklea quickly descended the marble steps outside Gringotts, glancing briefly up at overcast skies before mingling with the usual crowd congesting Diagon Alley. Since moving to London, he had needed to inform the bank of his change of address – the reason for his trip to the Alley this morning. He had wanted to get settled in his apartment before training was really stepped up with finals on the horizon in a few months, and getting his bank details sorted was one of the first steps towards this.

Walking past the entrance of Quality Quidditch Supplies, Dimitri couldn’t help himself but double back and go in. Just for a quick look. He couldn’t help but get incredibly nostalgic in Quidditch stores: places he’d never dreamed he’d be able to afford products from as a boy. There was something about the smell of broom polish that was uniquely calming too.

He didn’t want to linger too long: his tall frame brought enough attention to himself already, but he simply couldn’t resist quickly purchasing a copy of Quidditch International from the shell-shocked looking sales clerk. The World Cup was coming up next year, and it never hurt to read up on your potential opposition.

He paid less attention when he returned to the street, immediately opening the front cover and skim reading as he walked. Fergus made an appearance then, finally awakening from the nap he’d been taking in the crook of Dimitri’s collar: announcing his presence with a sleepy hoot in his ear. Acknowledging him with a friendly scratch behind his head, Dimitri only paused momentarily before continuing on towards the exit at the Leaky Cauldron.

But Fergus had other ideas. Something shiny had caught his eye, and quicker than a quaffle through a goal post he had taken off after it, quickly disappearing from sight.

“Fergus!” exclaimed Dimitri, in a half hearted attempt to bring the owl back. He knew full and well that the tiny bird’s attention would be focused on whatever had made him fly off now, and he would have to go and fetch him before he got hurt or lost.

Dodging through the crowd, he was thankful for his height advantage now as he caught a glimpse of russet brown feathers darting around way up ahead. Good, that meant that whatever Fergus was chasing had stopped at least.

Raising his voice again, Dimitri yelled over the bustle of the crowd, “Fergus! Get back here this instant or you’ll be sleeping in your cage tonight!” Not that threats had ever worked before, but Dimitri could always hope. Fergus’ movements were becoming agitated, and Dimitri’s pace increased to try and reach him before he could cause any lasting damage to something, straining to keep the bird in sight in the crowd.

[Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie]

[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] Well this was an incredibly new experience. Fin had been sober before, spent the first 14, 15 years of her life that way, then the hospital had kept her clean, but she'd gone back into her old ways. What made this time different was that it was her choice. She was sober because she wanted to be... well, Scott had begged her to be. It was a simple enough deal, he would help her with the pregnancy, he would then take the baby and the pair of them would leave her life forever. He would never darken her doorway again, he would never try to contact her, he would let her live her life, do whatever she wanted, let her fool herself into believing he was dead, try to forget she had ever known him, that any of this had happened. But now she had to get through the pregnancy, take each day as it came, feel the thing inside her grow at an alarming rate, her body not yet showing to the naked eye under her clothes but she was thickening out. She was sore, constantly unable to get comfortable but she kept thinking about the end of it all, when she could go back to being normal. Still, every day was hard, her body wanting the drugs that were slowly leaving her system. Having to keep telling herself, after this amount of time, the drugs weren't in her blood anymore, there was no alcohol racing through her, it was all in her brain, the psychological effects of her addiction. Her usual spaced out demeanor was replaced with the fact she was going stir crazy, being constantly aware of everything around her, the discomfort. She needed to get out before she went crazy. Which was how she found her way to Diagon Alley. Shopping wasn't something she really relished, not like some girls, but to know she could just be outside, feel the breeze on her face, not have people staring at her, whispering behind their hands that that was Finlay, she knew those two boys that died. The gently rumble of conversation in Diagon Alley should have sent her into a paranoid freak out, but it was somewhat comforting. She wasn't the main topic of conversation here, people had their own lives to get on with, and Fin couldn't help but smile as she eavesdropped on conversations had by the surrounding wizards as they moved on to their next place. Then something caught her attention, the sound of someone's raised voice, the tone threatening, but not in the way that would make her scared, more like a parent with a child. Her eyes darted in the direction, more from curiosity than anything, only to see a tiny ball of... brown come zigzagging across the heads of the patrons in the street. Dipping and lifting, the little thing aimed right at her, pulling up to hover in front of her for a moment. Raising her arm up, Fin chuckled as the tiny little owl landed on her sleeve, twisting its head around to look at her as though it was confused. The very look of this bird, head twisted unnaturally by human standards, made Fin laugh as she brought her free hand up to stroke its wing, "Hello... where did you come from?"

[Dimitri Beklea]

Dimitri could see Fergus up ahead, attacking some poor woman’s hat. That naughty bird! He was going to be in enormous trouble when Dimi finally got his hands on him. But just as soon as he was getting so close, Fergus spotted his looming form with a squawk and zoomed off again. He could tell he was in for it, and had no intention to bring punishment on himself sooner.

Dimitri’s body sagged slightly in exasperation, and briefly apologized to the rather flustered looking woman before jogging off again after his wayward pet. He was afraid for a moment he had lost him, and that he wouldn’t be able to find him again. But no, he spotted him mooching to some poor girl – probably after food treats or her shiny watch, and he picked up his pace again to reach her before Fergus could fly away again.

“Fergus!” he exclaimed, breaking free of the flow of people to come to a halt in front of the girl whom Fergus seemed to have taken quite a shine to. The little owl was a naturally friendly thing, and had made his way up to the girl’s shoulder and was busying himself with cuddling into the warm crook of her neck. He barely batted an eyelid at him master, and Dimitri wondered whether he was ignoring him in an attempt to hide.

“I’m really sorry about him – he gets a bit excited sometimes,” apologized Dimitri, offering her his hand, “I’m Dimitri Beklea, by the way.”

[Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie]

[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] Blessed little thing, it was incredibly cute and adorable, which was why Fin didn't mind it moving up her arm and onto her shoulder, nuzzling through her hair to get to her neck. Even considering it was on the side where Scotty had all but torn her throat out, still showing a slight mess of scar tissue down her neck and shoulder, she didn't mind the owl's affectionate cuddling beneath her hair. Because of the imperfection to her skin on her neck, Fin rarely wore her hair up anymore, opting for her long locks to cover it as much as possible. It was easier that way in school, enough people stared and talked without having something else for them to focus on, to fuel more rumours. She couldn't help but chuckle at the feeling of the feathers fluttering and brushing against her. Normally, she freaked out when people came anywhere near touching her neck, but this was different, it was an owl! He didn't mean her any harm, though she wasn't entirely sure why it had decided to pin point her. Of all the people in the alley... of course, she had no idea he might be after her watch. Still chuckling, reaching her hand up to pet the small creature who had taken residence in her neck, Finlay didn't really pay attention to the person stood in front of her. She knew someone was there, made a logical conclusion that it was probably the owner, but she was wracked with giggles at the tickling sensation of this bird nuzzling closer, and the situation itself. It was only when she heard the voice that she was able to get a control on her little giggle fit, using her free hand to wipe away the moisture from her eyes, taking in a deep breath. "Oh... it's fine... don't ap..." Wait, what? Dimitri Beklea? THE Dimitri Beklea? Fin felt her stomach fall at her feet as her eyes shot to him. Considering the fact her stomach felt like it had just vacated her body, when she set eyes on Dimi, whatever had replaced it, or was still there, knotted and twisted uncomfortably, causing her smile to fall. As though she was in autopilot, Fin's body reacted, talking his hand and shaking it. He was taller, much taller than Auggie, but jeez... they'd always teased him about the resemblance, but this was uncanny when she was face to face with him. "Fin... Finlay. Finlay Mackenzie." A sense of grief washed over her as she wrapped her hand carefully around the owl on her shoulder, pulling him away gently and holding him out to the Quidditch star stood before her. She likely looked starstruck, but she was anything but. On a normal day, that might have been the case. Not now though, he was a walking clone of August, and that was making her feel quite strange, like her head was swimming. From the outside, Fin had paled quite considerable, the saying "like she'd seen a ghost" becoming somewhat comical in its irony. The happy tears she had dabbed from her eyes just moments before were threatened to be replaced with real tears as Fin bit down on her lip. "I'm sorry... excuse me."

[Dimitri Beklea]

Fergus was laying it on thick – he knew Dimitri too well. It was difficult for anyone to stay angry with the tiny owl for long, and already he was beginning to forgive the owl. Thankfully Fergus was a bird and not an evil mastermind. The world would be in very great trouble if he hatched a plan to take over – the public would be powerless to resist.

At least he wasn’t inconveniencing the girl in any way – at least none that was apparent if her giggles were anything to go by. The girl herself looked to be a similar age to his youngest sister, with long dark hair and a friendly expression. He reasoned she probably went to Hogwarts – it was the only wizarding school nearby.

She began to reply, admittedly if it was a little out of breath, but quickly a look of shock crossed her features, and the smile she’d been wearing dissolved almost as rapidly. Confused, concern crossed his features as to what had so suddenly made the girl’s manner change; he shook her hand carefully, unsure of how exactly to react in this situation. He smiled reassuringly when she gave her name, but the concerned line between his brows remained. Dimitri had grown up caring for the well being of his younger sisters, and he automatically fell back into old habits.

Her expression grew gradually more distraught, the cause of which Dimitri was completely and utterly mystified about, but he carefully took back Fergus in his long fingers when she held him out. “Thanks, he’s a very naughty bird sometimes. Lucky he took such a shine to you else he might not have landed again for ages.” Quickly releasing the owl onto his shoulder and allowing him to burrow into his collar so the small fluffy thing would be no further nuisance, Dimitri quickly returned his attention to the upset schoolgirl before him.

And then she started to tear up. Dimitri certainly hadn’t set out this morning prepared for this. “Wait! Are you alright?” he exclaimed, reaching out to stop the girl from running off. “What’s wrong?”

Was it something he’d said?

[Finlay Cassandra Mackenzie]

[atrb=width,450,true][atrb=cellspacing,0,true][atrb=cellpadding,0,true][atrb=border,0,true][atrb=background,http://i51.tinypic.com/2yotog1.png,true][atrb=background,http://i56.tinypic.com/9prvw0.png][atrb=style,padding:0px 50px;background-position:top;background-repeat:no-repeat;] She'd been doing so well, the sobriety was hard, she was clean body wise, but her brain still craved the rush, some days worse than others. Today had been good, but after seeing Dimitri, all she wanted to do was take something, just to get rid of the pain of remembering August. Just as he hadn't set out in the morning to meet a tearful girl, she hadn't planned on walking into the Auggie-clone. She couldn't break though, she wouldn't. She had to get used to the pain, how it all felt, deal with it like normal people would. His arm reached out for her, the worry in his voice threatening her already faltering emotions. She was trying so hard to keep the tears in, he had no idea why she was upset, she must have looked like a fool. But instead of making his excuses and leaving her in her shell shocked condition, he was there, making sure she was alright. For that reason alone, she couldn't walk away. Her hands covered her face, not because the tears were falling but that not seeing his face made it easier to compose herself, calm herself down. After a moment, Fin sighed as she dropped her arms down, "I'm sorry... it's just... you remind me of someone I knew... it's hard."

[/b] The thoughts of Auggie were flooding back and Fin forced a smile as the tears welled again, a few slipping onto her cheeks. "He was a really good guy."

Great. Dimitri Beklea. World class Quidditch player. Famous. And she was sobbing in front of him. Fin shook her head, growling at herself in frustration. "God... I'm so stupid. You really... -shouldn't- have to deal with this. Just ignore me, please."[/justify][/size][/color][/font][/td][/tr][/table][/center]