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Post by Vivian Nazarova on Sept 3, 2009 11:43:43 GMT 1
Again, so far so good. They were a little far away, but if they could send Sam to her then there shouldn’t be any problem with her staying in—
“Staying in Hogsmeade is not an option.”
... What?
Images of Scotty floated in Vivian’s head and her jaw clenched a little. The impact that the statement had had on her would certainly not have been lost on Sam. Not allowed to stay in Hogsmeade? No, no, that absolutely was not negotiable. She wasn’t leaving. She couldn’t leave. There was Scotty and Ed and Lenny and mostly Scotty to think about. Decades? Vivian may have all the time in the world, but everyone she knew and loved certainly didn’t have decades while she went skipping around taking Vampire 101.
She started shaking her head immediately; eyes closed as though half in disbelief. “No,” she said quietly, then looked up at Sammy and repeated “No” again with a little more force in her tone. “I can’t leave.” Her and Dacian had already been through this, and if Dacian wasn’t able to drag her away, no stranger was going to either.
Still, he’d been reasonable so far. Maybe they could make an arrangement, or, or something? “Is zhere a different vay?”
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Post by Samuel Jacobs on Sept 3, 2009 12:03:01 GMT 1
Samuel was ready for the denial, the refusal, but he still felt the pity well in his gut. “I’m sorry, Vivian. It’s the only way. Dacian made a mistake staying here with you. As soon as the change began, he should have taken you somewhere else to rise. There’s a reason the coven only turns humans who are prepared. They’ve already come to terms with the fact that they will never age, that they’ll see their friends and loved ones grow old and die. You had no such chance, and staying here, you haven’t had to think about it. It’s as if you’re continuing your old life, but that just can’t happen.
“You need to come away from this place and begin this new life. It will pain you, and those you leave behind, but it will be a lesser pain that staying here will cause in the long term.” Dacian had messed up, she had no idea. She was still attached to her mortal life. In her mind, she was still human. He’d seen it happen too many times before. The acceptance never came, and the ones unfortunate enough not to let go of their mortality withered away. It was a fate worse than death to be trapped in the past you could never return to.
“Vivian, I could never apologise enough, but you can’t stay here. It will hurt you, and it will hurt your friends. I hate to do this to you, especially as we’ve just met, but imagine what would happen if you stayed here. Think forward a year, five years, try ten, fifty, a hundred. You’re caught in time, and nobody outside of the coven can stay in this limbo with you.” He willed her to see, realise the damage that would come of staying. The only way was to make a clean break, as it should have been when she’d died.
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Post by Vivian Nazarova on Sept 9, 2009 16:07:14 GMT 1
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And then everything hit home.
Vivan had thought about the future a few times. Not for long though. Once or twice maybe, in passing, mostly because she didn’t want to think about it. She figured she’d hit that hurdle when she got there. It was too early to think of that now, surely? After all, they still had time, right?
But now she didn’t have a choice but to think about it.
A year? Scotty would have graduated. Maybe she’d still be at the Hogs Head. Life as normal.
Five years? Scotty would be in his twenties. Maybe have a small place. She’d still be fifteen.
Ten? Ed and Cassie would be married. Maybe. But they might not be a Hogs Head any more. They could be anywhere. Scotty would be in his late thirties. He’d want to settle down. But with her? It wasn’t possible was it? She couldn’t... He’d... Someone else...
Fifty. Everyone she knew would be older. Life wouldn’t be the same any more. Ed would be seventy, and even though wizards had a longer life expectancy than muggles she couldn’t pretend life would be the same. She’d still be there, but everyone else would have gone and changed around her. Would they even be the same people?
One hundred? Scotty, 117. Ed, 120. They might still be alive, but they’d be getting on in years and their future would be dubious.
And after that? Vivian could visualise nothing. If that was because her mind didn’t want to go there or because she actually couldn’t think that far ahead she didn’t know, but her heart felt heavy. Her fingers were clutching hard onto the edge of the table and her expression was ashen.
There was always suicide...
Vivian started to cry. She couldn’t help it. She didn’t want to think about the future. It hurt. Her head was shaking again, eyes scrunched. Her mind was locking back into stubborn gear and didn’t want to budge. She wasn’t leaving. “I can’t!” She couldn’t leave.
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Post by Samuel Jacobs on Sept 27, 2009 12:25:08 GMT 1
He saw the panic build, the whites around her eyes widening. She was thinking about it, and understandably was afraid. The concept was the hardest to get to grips with for new vampires. The blow of it probably hurt more because she had been cushioned from it. Samuel considered himself a kind and gentle man, but he’d hurt this girl with the sheer truth of her situation.
Sighing, he rubbed a hand over his chin. People were started to glance over as tears welled down her cheeks. He took a handkerchief from his pocket and handed it to her. She said she couldn’t leave, but in reality she couldn’t think. “You have to, Vivian. You cannot ignore this. This pain you feel now is nothing compared the collective pain you will cause your friends and yourself in the future. Mortals cannot comprehend. You will live forever. You will be forever young. You will inspire in them jealousy. No matter their intentions toward you now, it is inevitable that they will see your youth and earn for it. It is dangerous for them to witness your immortality while they themselves grow old. They simply cannot bare it, and neither can you.”
The older vampire leaned earnestly across the table. “The truth of life hurts, Vivian. Don’t let it hurt you any longer.” He reached to lay cool fingertips on hers where they gripped the table so tightly. “Let me help you, please.”
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Post by Vivian Nazarova on Sept 27, 2009 17:45:06 GMT 1
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Now Sam had gone and done it. On the plus side? The tears has stopped. On the negative side? Vivian was now staring at Samuel with wide eyes as though she’d just been gravely affronted. It was like he was saying that Scotty, or Ed, or Cassie would grow to hate her! They wouldn’t! Would they? No. She shouldn’t be humouring that train of thought. They wouldn’t! She choked. They would never... The tears started welling again.
That was the last straw. Vivian stood up, and for a moment it looked like she was incapable of doing much more except shake her head again. “I’m sorry... I...” She needed to get out of here. She needed to get away. She needed to slam these horrible thoughts down to the deepest corner of her mind and never think of them again. She was happy here! Why was this man trying to shake up and break down her comfortable little world?
“Sankyou for zeh drink,” she said in a manner that anyone without advanced hearing would have had trouble deciphering what she was saying. “But I sink I should be getting back. It vos nice to meet you,” she said with a politeness that sounded automatic, and with that, she attempted to scurry her way back out of the Three Broomsticks, preferably to crawl back into the Hog to hide and turn her music up to thought-numbing levels, cry a lot, and try and pretend this had never happened.
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Post by Samuel Jacobs on Oct 3, 2009 12:35:45 GMT 1
He thought for a moment the words might have penetrated. That wide-eyed look, the panic as the truth sunk in. But then the clouds descended and the denial set in. Samuel knew then he had lost this round. This was going to take longer than he anticipated.
The tears began to well again, and the apologies came out stammered. Samuel sat back in his seat, the unused handkerchief clenched in his fist. He nodded his head to the polite dismissal, glad at least she had not resorted to shouting. “You’re welcome.” he muttered, watching as she turned her back and scurried out of the pub.
With an exasperated sigh, the vampire tucked the handkerchief back in his coat and stood. With a grimace, he gulped down the rest of Vivian’s drink (his own blood had no sustenance, but it was that or hand a goblet of vampire blood to the bartender to clean and that just seemed rude). He set the two empty glasses on the bar, set a few coins down to cover the tip and retreated upstairs.
Samuel rarely failed, and Vivian was making it difficult to succeed. Short of abducting her, he could foresee no easy way to get her to the coven. He could simply deem her not worth the time, but he felt a duty to the girl. She would be safe and eventually happy with the coven, it was just a matter of convincing her of that. This was going to take some work.
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